Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Memory Nest

(Picture found on Pinterest) 

Emma has 'pecked' me for the Memory Nest tag.  If you'd like a few more details on it, please see her post.

The Rules: 
1. thank the person who 'pecked' you.  (Thank you, Emma!)
2. list five things that start with "when I grow up and have my own house..." (they can be true, or utterly ridiculous, whatever you feel like writing :-))
3. 'peck' one other person and let them know that you have done so.

1.  When I grow up and have my own house...I'm going to stop eating so much sugar because I just know that having my own house is going to magically give me the discipline which I now lack.  (And until that happy time comes, I'll enjoy my cookie--because I deserve it for making such a noble resolution.)

2.  When I grow up and have my own house...I'm going to have lots and lots of children.  And I'm going to handle all the chaos with grace and ease...and even ENJOY it!  I can see myself now: pulling a pan of well-baked bread out of the oven, while balancing my one-year-old girl on my hip, and calling to my little son to "wait a moment!  Mommy will be right there."  Oh! such bliss!  No, I'm serious! I like the feeling of being a busy, bustling housewife, with so many things to do

3.  When I grow up and have my own house...everything will be in spotless order, because I can't stand a messy house.  My children won't have trouble picking up after themselves because they will only have one toy a piece.  It's simpler that way.   (Just kidding.  I'm not that cruel.)

4.  When I grow up and have my own house...I will get enormous amounts of writing and housework down all in the space of time designated for my children's afternoon naps.  (Don't ask me how.) 

5. When I grow up and have my own house...I'll probably faint from exhaustion.
I peck...Natalie.

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Just a Bit of Random Chatter All About What I've Been Doing Lately

Okay.  So I have a problem with overthinking my posts.  I have so many ideas in my head but I don't make much progress on them because I keep trying to make them into some kind of polished, major work of writing.  As if I'm writing a top-notch essay for college or something, instead of just a simple conglomeration of my thoughts.   
So, throwing aside--for the time being--the four posts which are currently languishing in my drafts, I'm simply going to ramble on about the things I've been doing lately.  Such facts may prove of very little interest to anyone but myself, but whatever.  Here goes nothing.

Oh!  Just one more thing before the nothing.  This is a very random post, so it will be complete with random pictures and all that.  And I'm going to try not to worry about it all making sense...because that will take me too long.  Sometimes nonsense is a necessity. 

 I've been enjoying...
1.  Spending time with my adorable little nephew, who slept over at our house for the first time this past weekend while my brother and his wife were away.  I got to hold him at our church dinner, and feed him off of my own plate, and this just thrilled me to no end!  (I was born to be a mother!  I just know I was!)

2.  Staying up late at night talking and watching movies with my family.  

I have not been enjoying...

1. The fact that late nights don't mix too well with early mornings.  I've been finding it extremely difficult to get out of bed these days.  And cold weather, which makes one's bed so comfortable to curl up in, doesn't help either.  

I've been playing...

1. The piano.  As usual.  It's my go-to when I'm feeling out of sorts, or when I'm feeling extra full of joyful, pent-up emotions.  I'm so thankful my mom had me learn an instrument when I was younger, because I don't know what I would do without it now.

2. Pool.  We inherited my grandfather's pool table this year and it has been in high demand.  It used to be more of a boys' game, but I've found that I enjoy hitting the balls around, too.  It's another means of releasing pent up emotions, ya know?  Boy, but I can really slam those balls around when I'm in the proper mood.

I've been reading...

1.  Too many depressing news articles which make me want to go and shake some sense into the entire population of our country--and particularly into the members of our crazy government. 

2.  Eve's Daughters.  This is an excellent book by Lynn Austin which Naomi recommended in a review on her blog.  I really enjoyed this book and I heartily recommend it likewise.

I've been laughing at...

1.  The cute antics of my nephew.  How can you not laugh when he's helping his daddy put the eggs into the egg carton and sticks his little thumb right through one?  Poor baby.  He was so taken by surprise.  The eggs had never played such a trick on him before!

2.  Old articles written by me and my siblings for our family newspaper.  I was reading over some of these with two of my brothers the other night and we were laughing our heads off.  (That's a rather formidable image, isn't it?)

3.  My pitiful pool playing skills.  My adage is: Close your eyes, hit, and hope for the best.  Only I don't close my eyes, because I'm not THAT silly.  (Really though.)

4.  Loves Unfolding Dream.  Don't get me started!  That movie was SO painful.  And I laughed in derision the whole way through it.

I've been dreaming about...

1.  The stories in my head and thinking about getting them down on paper.  (Thinking about it.)  Every time I ride in the car and the music begins to play...oh!  anything is possible!  But when I sit down in front of my computer?  Forget it.  Dreams can wait until another day!

2.  Becoming a wife and mother.  This is a nice thought.  A very nice thought.  The hope of it's realization is pretty much nil at this point, but hey!  It's a dream!  I can at least have my dreams, can't I?  (Haha!)

I've been watching...

A lot of movies.  Including Persuasion (1995), which I really enjoyed; and Ivanhoe, which we just finished watching for my brother's fourteenth birthday.  (It's sort of a fourteenth birthday tradition.)  Also I've seen quite a few Danny Kaye films lately which aren't top-notch according to my standards, but which are still quite entertaining. 


...because this is a  very random post...

I thought I'd share with you a little random snippet from Winnie the Pooh.  Just because.  I thought it was funny...and you might to.  (Or you might not, but whatever.)  It's actually the Contradiction for The House at Pooh Corner (which is the second Winnie the Pooh book...but you probably didn't care about that.)  Anyway...

An Introduction is to introduce people, but Christopher Robin and his friends, who have already been introduced to you, are now going to say Good-bye.  So this is the opposite.  When we asked Pooh what the opposite of an Introduction was, he said "The what of the what?" which didn't help us as much as we had hoped, but luckily Owl kept his head and told us that the opposite of an Introduction, my dear Pooh, was a Contradiction; and, as he is very good at long words, I am sure that that's what it is.
                                                                                                ~The House at Pooh Corner, A.A. Milne
I just thought it was funny.  That's all. 
And while we're on the subject of funny.  I wrote this little rhyme the other day.  It just kind of came to me.  An inspiration of the moment you might say.  Do you want to hear it?  (Well, I can't wait for your answer so I guess you're going to hear it whether you want to or not.)  Here it is:
I don't know what to write,
I don't know what to write,
That's why I'm sitting here,
Writing nothing.
If the words would just unite,
My thoughts could then take flight,
But they won't and so I sit,
Doing nothing.
Okay!  So I'm not a poet.  And now you know it!  (Haha!)  But hey, give me credit.  At least the words rhymed! 
Now I'm going to publish this post and feel very proud of myself for publishing two posts in one day!  And then the pride is going to give way to embarrassment and I'm going to go hide my head in the sand in shame that I've just made such a ridiculous fool of myself.  :D  (Oh, dear!  But I haven't got any sand!) 
Well, good-bye, good people!  Cheerio, and all that! 
(And as Tigger would say, "T.T.F.N.!  Ta, ta for now!") 

"It's Raining on Celia again."

"Then move Celia again!"
"There's no more dry places to move her."
~The Apple Dumpling Gang~

Oh, dear.  I'm awfully sorry to do this to all you dear people so soon after my last rainy day post, but I did promise to let you know if ever I needed to indulge in another one of these tear-filled rants, so here I am...true to my word.  

It's been raining an awful lot around here this past week.  And to be honest, my mood has matched the weather pretty much drop for drop.  You might say I've been having a bit of a personal downpour. 

Strike that.  I haven't actually been down-pouring.  In fact, I've been fairly calm without--the storm has just been brewing on the inside far more than is entirely comfortable.  You know how you can feel the rain in the air before it begins to pelt the ground?  Well, that's what it's like.  I'm an emotional rain cloud just waiting to burst. 

And yeah...there's precious few dry places to move to. 

I don't know how much to say for fear of saying too much, but if any of you out there have ever experienced adoption first hand, I think you'll understand.  I have four siblings who became a part of our family just over a year ago.  I'm not going to say that I regret adopting--because I don't (momentarily, maybe, but overall, no)--and I'm not going to say that I don't love my new siblings--because I do (even though I don't always feel it).  But there's no getting around it, life has been radically changed, and no matter how many times I tell myself that what we're doing is a good thing--that our situation could be a whole lot worse--and that we actually have been extremely blessed in the small of amount of issues we've had to deal with...still.  There are some days that are just downright hard, aggravating, and unpleasant.

It's hard melding two families into one.  It's HARD.  You don't have the same kind of relationship with your adopted siblings as you have with your biological siblings, and while you want to treat everyone the same and love your new siblings as much as your old siblings, somehow you just can't.  And I feel bad about that sometimes because I want to love them.  I want to feel as if they're truly a part of our family.  I want to enjoy being around them. 

But honestly, there are days when I don't feel any of that. 

I know a lot of it depends on me and my attitude.  My new siblings annoy me a lot, but I know that most times it's not really their fault.  It's mine.   Sure, they're not very tactful, nor very sensitive, nor overly observant of other people's needs.  But what can you expect?  They didn't have a good upbringing.  They didn't have parents who taught them to know the difference between right and wrong, from the time they were too little to talk.  They lived in a place where the strongest one wins, the weakest one loses, and it's every man for himself.  Really, what can you expect? 

And so, as I was struggling with feelings of frustration today, the thought occurred to me.  My new siblings don't know God like I do.  I've been a Christian since I was seven, and I've known God all my life.  They haven't.  With the huge head start I have on them, I really shouldn't be expecting them to meet me half way.  I have Jesus.  I need to be going more than half way.  Just like He did for me.

There.  I've just given myself some good advice.  (I feel like Alice in Wonderland...she's always giving herself advice, isn't she?)  Thanks everyone for letting me spout off.  (Not that you really let me, since I never asked for your permission, but...ahem.  Anyway.)

Note: The funny thing about blog posts is that they take me so long to write that by the time I get to the end of them I'm not feeling any of the emotions I was feeling when I started.  Actually, this post took me two days to write (or rather, edit) and here I am on the second day feeling quite happy and peaceful.  Adoption?  Ha!  It's a piece of cake!  ("You mean it ain't gold?"  ~Apple Dumpling Gang, again.  Sorry I must have that on the brain.)  No, of course I don't really mean that.  Adoption IS hard and I'll be feeling it in another hour no doubt, but for right now everything's really okay.  So, yeah, I probably don't even need to publish this post, but I think I will just because it took me so long to write.  It would be a shame to let all that time go to waste. 

"You can only come to the morning through the shadows."
~J.R.R. Tolkien

"And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us."  Romans 5:3-5