Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Living in a World where "Love Comes Softly" ~What to Expect (and a Bit of Friendly Advice)~


 

To the Ladies:

1. First off, you will have romance.  Plenty of it.  Love doesn't merely come softly in this series, it comes frequently.  So don't worry about the possibility of being a lonely, unhappy woman all your days, because it's just not going to happen.

2. When your first husband dies, don't get discouraged, there's another one just around the corner.  (Seriously.  There is.  Every single time.)

3.  If a man--a  total stranger, mind you, who you only met like two minutes ago--makes you an offer of marriage for the convenience of you both, don't hesitate.   Say yes.  You may think marrying without love is a hard and depressing prospect, but nothing could be further from the truth.  It is a proven fact that marriages of convenience are your safest bet for a successful and happy matrimonial state.  (I'm not kidding!  All the books say so.  Ask any book you like.)  

4. You're faced with two suitors.  One is rich and says many sweet and flattering things to you, the other is a mysterious nobody who thinks he knows how to plow a field better than you do.  (Imagine that!)  And now, it seems, you're having trouble deciding between them. 


Honestly!  Where's the dilemma?  If you have any sense of romance in you at all you should know by now that the mysterious stranger always wins out over the flattering rich man.  That's so obvious.  (And besides, the mystery man just happens to be  your childhood enemy--go figure--AND...he's still carrying around the hair ribbons he took from you during your school years, so really!  How could there be any room for doubt?  If that's not love, tell me...what is?)

5.  Expect to have a complete makeover at some point during your married life.  And I mean a COMPLETE makeover.  In fact, there may be very little resemblance to your former self at all, but that's okay.  That's the way the world goes.


Get the picture?

6.  As a child you may be able to make fried chicken, but don't worry you'll get straightened out as you get older.   By the time you're married you'll have forgotten all about that, and will have mastered the art of burning your biscuits black and generally making food which is unfit to eat--just as every proper heroine should.
 
7.   You're a brunette, that is true.  And that isn't the style, certainly, for all your female predecessors have been blondes.  But calm down.  It's okay.  Remember the makeover.  By hook or by crook (or by wig, or by dye, or by...SOMETHING), you will be a blonde by the end of the series.
 

Yeah.  That's more like it!

 
8.  The story is drawing to a close.  You're in love with the nicest young man you've ever met, but your lives are taking two different directions.  The situation seems hopeless.  Time is running out, and soon you'll be separated from him forever--never having been able to tell him how much you truly care. 
     STOP stressing outPlease.  You're driving me nuts.  Just calm yourself and wait for the final scene.  That's when your man will suddenly realize he can't live without you and come dashing by on his horse to bring you back.  I'm telling you, these men never can afford to lose a triumphant ending, even for your peace of mind.  So relax.  You're going to enjoy that romantic moment when it comes. 

 
To the Gentlemen:  

1.  Don't freak out over the argument you just had with the heroine.  That's your key to success.  Keep it up.  A heroine always falls for the guy who argues with her. 

2.  Um...a bit of friendly advice here.  You might want to think twice before marrying that girl.  You see, she's never been married before and that means you'll be her first husband, and uh, sorry to break it to you but...first husbands die, and that is a fact.   (Take for example, Marty's first husband, Missie's first husband, and Belinda's first husband.  Bing. Bing. Bing.  Dead. Dead. Dead.  I'm telling you, that's a rather disconcerting pattern.)
 
 
3.  Throughout the course of the story, expect to receive a lot of good advice from a man named Clark.  He's a man who always has something vital to say.  Also I suggest that you listen to him and take his advice, because he's obviously very smart.  (After all, he's the only "first husband" to survive a marriage, and that's saying a lot.)
 
4.  Make sure when you get married that you move away from your wife's family.  Not because you don't like them, but because it proves your independence and manhood...or maybe just because it provides that tearfully happy ending which is highly important for drama.
 
5.  The girl you marry will be a feisty, independently-minded woman.  Depend upon it.  That's the only kind there is. 
 
6.  And finally, if you happen to be one of those privileged men who falls in love with a widow, all I have to say is congratulations!  You are now guaranteed to live a long and happy life!  
 
 
The End.
 

57 comments:

  1. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

    THIS IS PERFECTION.

    Honestly, I could not have said it better myself. You've covered everything. I am dissolving in giggles. ;-)

    "Expect to receive a lot of good advice from a man named Clark." Oh, so I'm not the only one who finds Clark over-the-top and annoying? This is good to know. Oh, GOOD POINT -- I never thought about that, how Missy was such a capable cook when she was little and then a fuddy-duddy when she grew up. (This makes no sense at all.)

    You should be given some kind of award for exposing the full sappiness of these movies.

    ~Emma

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    1. I'm delighted this post amused you, Emma! Seriously, your comment made me very happy. :)

      Haha. Yes, Clark does get a bit annoying to me sometimes. I don't know what it is exactly, but when he goes into one of his 'talks' I tend to roll my eyes a little. Probably because he seems so extremely GOOD. (Not that there's anything wrong with being good, of course, but sometimes he comes across as TOO good, if you know what I mean.) Heehee. Yes, exactly. I can't find the sense in it, either. ;)

      Aww. Really? Well, thanks. I have to admit, I had a lot of fun doing it! :)

      ~Miss March

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  2. HA. HA. HA. Goodness, Miss MARCH! The wit is BIG in here. :-) You made me laugh many times. " Love doesn't merely come softly in this series, it comes frequently." HAHAHA. I thought this was so funny, and I haven't even seen the show!! :-O

    I HAVE heard it's a show which is easily made fun of... :-D

    The 'complete makeover' thing is WEIRD. I mean... what? Did they replace the character with a different actress as the series continued? Or what? And what's up with the brunette-blonde shift? Explaaain. :-D

    Loved this. :-) I might have to steal this idea. :-P

    ~ Naomi

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    1. Aw. Thanks, Naomi! :D I'm so glad you were able to enjoy it, despite having never seen the movies.

      Ah, yes. The 'makeover'. You are right in assuming that the characters were replaced with different actresses. In fact, all three heroines switch actresses at some point during the series. All I can say is, the filmmakers must have been unconcerned about the second actresses looking similar to the first ones...especially in the case of the brunette-blonde switch. They could have at least given the second actress brown hair. That's not a very hard thing to do. But they didn't. And I have no idea why. :)

      Oh, please DO write a post like this one! I'd love to read it. I just know it be would hilarious! :)

      Thank you so much for your comment, Naomi! Your enthusiastic reception of this post made me SO happy! :)

      ~Miss March

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  3. Oh my gosh - this is hilarious! I love this post!! And it's so true - not that I've watched many Christian romances, but this is spot on for all the ones I have watched. Hahaha! Love this! ("Bing. Bing. Bing. Dead. Dead. Dead")

    By the way, I love the new look. I haven't been in the blogosphere recently, so this is the first time I've seen it, but it's really pretty. <3

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    1. Awwww. Thank you, Crista! I'm so happy you liked this post. That's means a lot to me. :D

      And I'm REALLY glad to see you back in the blogosphere!! :)

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  4. This was so cool! I loved it SO MUCHLY. :)

    #1 - YES. Wouldn't it be hilarious to write a story where the lady actually doesn't end up marrying? 'Cause, you know, not ALL of us have that vocation in life . . .
    #6 - This on is especially hilarious!! It's so weird why all heroines "can't cook."

    Oh, and #5 to the gentleman, was AWESOME. Romance novels always have that one type of girl!! Why can't they mix it up a bit?!!

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    1. Dear me, I don't know what to say...;) Thanks, Rosie. I'm thrilled that you liked it. :)

      #1- Positively hilarious! I'd love to pull that one in a story sometime, just for the sake of shocking everyone by being so "out of the box!" Haha! And that goes for the "can't cook" scenario, and the typical "independent and feisty" female. I SO want to mix things up a bit! Actually, I want to mix things up A LOT!!! ;) Heehee.

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    2. Haha, I want to mix up things too!! My great dream is to write a wonderful INTROVERTED heroine that everyone actually likes :)

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    3. Yes, yes!! Do it, Rosie!! A book about an introverted heroine would be EXTREMELY satisfying! :)

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    4. Working on it right now!! And the other thing about her is she's mute - she can't talk :D It should be good!!

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    5. Oh, that sounds delightful!! Will this be a short story or a long story?

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  5. Heehee. You tooootally have me giggling. I read the books a lot growing up (I know. They're different, but just saying... so you know where I'm coming from. ;D), but I actually haven't gotten around to seeing hardly any of these besides Love Comes Softly (which I actually own and quite love) and Love Begins (which I also quite enjoy for various reasons). But for the rest thus far.... yes. Quite. Rather. (Said in a British accent, of course. ;))

    So all that to say, you did a GREAT job poking a little hilarious fun without bashing! ;D

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    1. Thank you for your sweet comment, Heidi. I'm so glad this post didn't come across as bashing. I worry about that sometimes, because I do enjoy poking fun at things, but I certainly don't want to be mean about it. Having your vote of approval in that regard was very encouraging. :)

      I've never read the Love Comes Softly books. Are they good?

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  6. Haha, oh, Miss March, this is HILARIOUS. :D I LOVED it. I have only seen 4 or 5 "Love Comes Softly" movies, but I don't particularly care to watch any more. They're really 'mushy' and I find the characters annoying (except for Willie!!!) and basically all you said. ;) Sometimes, if I'm in a rare mood, I'd be willing to watch them, but there are so many better movies. ;)
    I don't have time to comment through on all of them, but I smiled to myself over each and every one! :D
    ~Miss Meg

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    1. Aww. Thank you. :) And I know what you mean. They're not my favorite movies, either. The acting and the script isn't the best, and there are definitely some characters that get on my nerves. (Missy especially annoys me in some of the later films.)

      Oh, but, Willie! Yes! He was always my favorite, too. There's just something about mysterious strangers with tragic pasts... ;)

      True. There are a great many movies which are better than these. I usually only watch the Loves Comes Softly movies with my mom and older sisters when we're in the mood for a girl's night and just want something light and fun. I have to admit, though, that I often end up groaning my way through them. :)

      Aww. And now you've made me smile, too. :) Thank you so much for your comment, Miss Meg.

      ~Miss March

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  7. Is this a Tv-series or a movie? I have never heard of it before.
    I really like your humorous take on it, I am sure this is advice we can all use, fictional or not;)

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    1. It's actually a series of eight individual movies, based off a series of books by Janette Oke. I've never read the books myself, but I've heard the movies are vastly different.

      Thank you!! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. :)

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  8. I have seen all of the Love Comes Softly movie several times, and I loved reading your post because everything is so true! :-)

    Lol. I always feel bad for the first husbands because you don't seem to see them long. It was really sad when Willy died, although I also like Zach. It's funny how Missie chose two husbands, who were both similar to each other.

    I always love Clark's advice in the movies, and the second Marty's advice. I'm so happy to find another person who has seen Love Comes Softly because I haven't met very many people who have seen it. What did you think of the movies?

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    1. Thanks, Ekaterina! :)

      Yes, poor fellows. Willy's death was the worst because he's the one you got to the know the best. I was very annoyed when they took him out. Hmmm...yes. That's true. They were both Sheriffs. Once a Sheriff's wife, always a Sheriff's wife. :)

      What did I think of the movies? Hmmm...good question. They definitely wouldn't be on my favorites list. I find the acting and script somewhat lacking in realism, and I confess I find them very easy to pick apart and laugh at, but still I enjoy watching them every now and then. What do you think of the movies? Oh, and I know you said you've seen all of them, but does that include the prequels and the Christmas movie, too? Because, I've never seen those. I've only ever seen movies 1-7.

      Thank you so much for your comment, Ekaterina! I loved hearing from you. Oh, and thank you for the follow, too! :)

      ~Miss March

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    2. Yes, I have seen the prequels and half of the Christmas movie. We have all of the dvds, but I'm waiting for Christmas to watch the Christmas movie from beginning to end. From what I have seen of the Christmas movie, I don't like it as much as the rest of the movies, including the prequels.

      As how the movies are made, I wouldn't rate them very high. When I watch a movie, I judge it based off of the story line, cinematography, acting, directing, and script. These movies which are really well made (like Citizen Kane or On the Waterfront) are some of my favorites, but I have another list of favorite movies, where I associate them with warm memories, story lines that I really like, and morals but are not as well made (like Rigoletto). Most of the Love Comes Softly movies would be high on this list because I have many warm and happy memories connected with them.

      I'm happy to follow your blog. I enjoy following blogs, whose posts I like to read. :-)

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    3. That makes sense. Not all movies have to be top-notch in order to be enjoyable. :) The Love Comes Softly movies have happy memories for me, too. I laugh at them a good deal, I admit, but they're usually the movies my sisters and mom and I go to when we're in the mood for a fun and relaxing "girls' night." :)

      Aww. Thanks. I'm glad you find my posts interesting.

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  9. LOL so much yes! I grew up watching LCS series! I have watched them all so many times- however, when you become more involved in film-making, and grow up, you begin to see a loooooooot more flaws in it then you did when you were ten. ;) They're really good feel good movies, but you hit every flaw on the head- I especially loved the "Don't worry if your husband dies, because another one is right around the corner" ;) XD Oh, and I especially love the make-overs when you get married. HAHHA!

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    1. Yes, that's so true! I enjoy watching these movies, but it's a lot harder now because I'm forever finding things that are wrong with them. Not that I actually mind that--I rather like picking movies apart--but I have to admit, it makes it next to impossible to get fully involved in the story. :)

      Yeah, it is pretty amazing how there's always another husband just waiting to be called for. ;) But it works well for a "love movie," as my brothers call them. After all, you get six love stories where otherwise you would only have had three. Haha!

      Thank you so much for your comment! And for the follow, too! :D

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  10. HAHAHA, very clever post, Miss March!

    I have sat down to comment on this post four times since you published it but I have always been interrupted. But no more, now I'm here and should have all the time I need! :D

    4. "the other is a mysterious nobody who thinks he knows how to plow a field better than you do. (Imagine that!)" How is that possible?...hmmm.
    6. Ha! Does that mean I don't have to learn to cook now because I will forget it all once I'm married? That's a mixed blessing. ;)

    2. "Bing. Bing. Bing. Dead. Dead. Dead. I'm telling you, that's a rather disconcerting pattern." I'll say, what shocking odds! :O (By the way, that wouldn't by any chance, be "The Happiest Millionaire" that you're quoting, is it?)

    One last thing, don't you think the hairstyles are a little to--tight? I mean, it's like their hair is pasted to their heads at times. That first picture that you used is a perfect example...

    ~Cordy

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    1. Thank you, Cordy!!! :D

      Four times? My goodness. Thank you for persevering. :) I'm so glad you finally found some uninterrupted time, because a comment from Cordy is always GREATLY appreciated. Seriously, you make me smile so much!! :D

      That is a very logical assumption. Yes, I think you can now forget about learning how to cook. Don't worry your brains over it anymore. It won't do you a lick of good. Haha! (By the way, do you like to cook?)

      Right again!! Wow, Cordy, you're good at this. That definitely was a quote from The Happiest Millionaire--though, actually, I'd forgotten all about it until you brought it up. Yikes! Cordy knows what I'm quoting better than I do!! Haha! :P

      Hmm...probably. Love Comes Softly is certainly not known for being accurate to the time period. There are definitely some modern hairstyles in those movies. By the way, have you ever seen Love Comes Softly?

      ~Miss March

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    2. Awww, thanks!!! That's very nice of you to say!! I love when I hear back from you at my blog or when we are having a conversation here at your blog! Either way, I have really enjoyed getting to know you!! :D

      I can't say that I've done a lot of cooking. Oh, I can make homemade mac n' cheese that is nummy. I can bake some fantastic chocolate chip cookies (if I do say so myself), and I'm a fair hand at bread. Haha, what about you?

      Haha, not quite as good as you. As I recall you finally solved the Chitty-Chitty Bang-Bang line. :) But I'm afraid I always have movie quotes in my head. :/ (It drives my older sister crazy!)

      I wasn't really referring to the accuracy, even though that kind of thing can bother me in movies. I was more referring to how they (the hairstyles, not the actresses), weren't very becoming. I have seen the first two movies. I remember trying to read the books but not being able to get past the way they talked. I know it may sound a little rude but I couldn't stop giggling. Haha. :D

      ~Cordy

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    3. Same here. I love having conversations. And getting to know you has been so much fun!! :)

      I definitely do more baking than cooking. Speaking of chocolate chip cookies, that's probably what I make the most. :) I've also been the official bread maker for the family for the past few years, though I haven't made it as much recently since we've been getting a lot of free bread. I definitely need to follow a recipe when I'm making food, though, as I'm not one of those people who can toss things together and end up with something good. ;) Heehee.

      Oh, oops. My mistake. ;) Well, coming from that angle, yes I'd say the hairstyles are rather tight. Certainly not the most attractive way of doing one's hair. :)

      I've only read parts out of the books and that was a while ago, so I don't remember how they talked, but I think I understand what you mean. And I must admit, I giggle over books, too, especially when they strike me as corny or unrealistic. :)

      ~Miss March

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    4. Oh, for sure! Recipes are a must! My mom is the type that can throw things together and while I have watched her and worked with her in the kitchen for several years now...I'm just not that talented. :P Haha. I just consider myself luck to know how to make chocolate chip cookies and bread. If all else fails, my (future) family can live off sandwiches and fresh berry dinners with cookie deserts. ;)

      Oh, corny and unrealistic are the worst! Haha. I will sit there laughing on my bed and my sister will come in all excited when she sees the cause of my merriment, wanting to read the book right after I finish, but once I tell her why I'm laughing, it's all over! :)

      ~Cordy

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    5. Haha! Sandwiches and fresh berries with cookies for dessert!! You've got it covered, Cordy! Your family will NOT starve!! ;)

      Oh, poor sister. You shouldn't get her hopes up like that. ;)

      ~Miss March

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  11. This is perfect. The end.

    Well, almost the end. ;) Hahaha, everything you said was just...so true. I've seen 7 of the Love Comes Softly movies and while I can enjoy the first and second...and maybe even the third....it just keeps tumbling downhill faster and faster. Did the screenwriters have ANY creativity at all? :P

    Haha, the mysterious stranger bit. I've actually always had a soft spot for Willie. He's my favorite. :) (Except my dad likes to joke about his hair a lot. Because he obviously uses a blow-drier to get it styled like that. hahaha)

    "first husbands die, and that is a fact. " HAHAHA

    And the last point. Oh my goodness, these movies.

    This was such a great post!!! :D

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    1. Awww. Thanks, Natalie! :D

      "Almost the end." Haha! That made me smile. :)

      I've seen seven of the Love Comes Softly movies, too. And you're right, they do get worse as they go on. The seventh one really took the cake with Belinda going from a cheerful, optimistic brunette, to a depressed and moody blonde. She was like a totally different person!!

      I've always liked Willie, too. That's why I was so annoyed when he died. (Haha! His hair! Yes, it's quite...interesting...to say the least. ;))

      Thank you, Natalie!! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! :D

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    2. :D Haha, I'm glad. :)

      And yes! It's like they wanted to change characters too, not just actresses. :P

      I knooow. It's just so wrong. Willie does NOT die in the books. Why did they think killing off each husband made a good tv show? I'll never understand that.

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    3. I know, right? I don't get the reasoning on that either. What's fun about having every husband die?? Thinking about it though, maybe it was a case of the actors leaving--like with the girls--and instead of changing actors they decided to just kill the character off and bring in a totally new character...for a bit of variety, you know. Haha. I'd be curious to know if they had planned from the beginning for each of the heroines to have two husbands, or if they sort of made that up as they went along. With Willie, I think the actor must have left because in the fifth movie--when it's going over how he died--it never shows his face. I've always thought that was rather peculiar.

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    4. I suppose that may have been why. I hate it when actors leave the show and mess up the story. :P haha
      That would be very interesting. And, I wonder if they ever regretted making the story so repetitive like that?
      I know! I thought that was odd too. You're right, he must have left. :(

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  12. Really want to see this now! This was super enjoyable, even though I've not seen the movie.

    ~Rilla Blythe

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    1. Thanks, Rilla. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

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  13. How on earth did I miss this?!

    Anyway, BASICALLY YES. This is, as Emma said, perfect ;D I have a love/hate relationship with this series myself, but OH MY WORD THIS IS AWESOME.

    The first husbands thing. Yes! It's just ridiculous, really.

    I don't even know what else to say because you already said everything so perfectly! :D

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    1. Aww. Thank you, Olivia! I'm so glad you liked this post! That makes me happy, happy! :D

      Thank you for your sweet comment!

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  14. Very funny! You should write more of these. :D

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed it, Jillian. And thanks for the suggestion. Maybe I will. ;)

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  15. This made me crack up so hard, friend! For once I'm in on the joke because I HAVE seen these movies (my mom loves them) so I actually know what you're talking about and get the jokes BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, I hate these movies and you poked fun at them and I loved every minute of it!!!! :) :) :)

    Have you read the books??? The movies were SO RIDICULOUSLY untrue to them it makes me sick! I don't even like the books (Beverly Lewis is just not my cup of tea and I couldn't stand the Western accents - UGH!) but I was STILL annoyed!

    I grew up with these movies so it goes without saying that I saw them before (ATTEMPTING) to read the books. So I thought they were accurate. THEY WERE NOT, SIR.

    And, just, AGH, yes to all of this!

    The whole "woman marries man, they have daughter, man promptly dies, woman remarries, daughter grows up and gets married, they have daughter, husband dies, woman remarries, daughter grows up and marries..." BOTHERS ME SOOOOOO MUCH! Like, how could the makers not realize what they were doing??? Or they did it on purpose???? But whyyyyy??? This is not good storytelling! This is repetitive and awkward and recycling in a very bad way!!! ARRGHHHAIR-COLORHA!!!! Yes!!! The "makeover." *cue very spooky music* Such a drastic makeover, in fact, that you will look NOTHING like your former self!!!!

    OH MY WORD, BELINDA'S HAIR-COLOR CHANGE!!! How did THAT happen??? (It amuses me still more that they don't even attempt to dye her hair darker. It's like they gave up??? "We are making the worst movies the world gas ever seen. But will we stop? NOOOOOOOOOO!!!")

    Also yes! Don't marry the rich guy! Marry the brooooooooding one!!! (Honestly I'd do that over marry that WEEEIRD rich ugly guy! He's creepy!)

    Erm. But Clark ISN'T her first husband???? Aaron dies... (Maybe I'm missing what you were trying to say...)

    CLARK SURVIVES EVVVVVVERYTHING!!! MAKEOVERS, DIFFERENT WIVES, SEVEN GENERATIONS, WORLD WARS, A NUCLEAR BOMB... CLARK SHALL REMAIN TO GIVE GOOD ADVICE TO THE MEN WHO WISH TO MARRY HIS DAUGHTERS AND GRANDDAUGHTERS!!!!

    Another thing I must note: ONLY the girls get movies??? Like, sorry Aaron and smaller child of Marty and Clark's, sorry adopted son of Missy and Willie and Mattie, sorry Belinda's brother - YOU. ARE NOT. IMPORTANT. We don't want to know if you survive your first marriage. We simply don't care. We will never see you again, probably. And we are okay with this. WOMENFOLK UNITE!!!

    Best. Post. Ever!

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    1. Yay! So glad you know these movies and were able to get the jokes. :) Haha. They really are so much fun to poke fun at, I have to admit. ;)

      Nope. I've never read the books. I did sort of skim over them once, though, and picked up on a few things that were totally different from the movies. (Such as Willie not dying, and Belinda actually being Clark and Marty's daughter instead of Missie's daughter. Things like that.)

      I knoooooow! It's extraordinarily repetitive. And the "makeover." Ha. Apparently the filmmakers didn't care about making all the movies fit together.

      EXACTLY! And it seems quite obvious that her blonde hair was a wig (or at least unnaturally dyed) so...if you're going to give her a wig anyway, why not a BROWN ONE?!!

      Yeah, not exactly the kind of guy you'd like to spend the rest of your life with. :P

      Right, he's not Marty's first husband. But he was his first wife's first husband. (If that makes sense.) So he really should have died long ago--before his first wife died--if he was going to follow the normal pattern of men in the Love Comes Softly world. But of course, he's an exception. So he survives. Heehee.

      Mwahahaha. Yes. He's invincible!!

      Ha. Good point. It's so true, though, the men certainly get the worst deal in these movies. Push 'em to the sidelines; don't finish their stories; kill 'em off. They don't get a fair chance. (All of them except Clark, of course. Because he's special. Heh.)

      Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it! And thanks for taking the time to leave such a long and enjoyable comment. :D

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    2. So much fun to poke fun at!!

      Right. Belinda, Missy, AND Ellie were all sisters! Not three generations of mothers and daughters. It's absurd.

      I guess not??? I don't know how you can just 'not care' that you are making horrendous movies? I mean, this is your passion, right? How can you be content with not doing it well? THIS MAKETH NO SENSE TO MY BRAIN.

      Right. He's weird, not to mention ugly. And Willie is admittedly cute and mysterious and it's all very romantic (that word again!), but did she never think about the fact that it could DANGEROUS??? Like he could be a serial killer or something!

      Yeah, I realized what you meant the second I pressed "publish." If Ellen had had her own movie, you can be sure Clark never would have seen the light of day - or, at least, he would have only seen it very briefly...

      Exactly! Back when I was younger and kind of into these movies (ha!), I wished they would do a movie about Collette and (WHAT IS HIS NAME??? the adopted son of Missy and Willie?) - anyway, those two. But they never did. Because he was a man-person! And we wouldn't want any stories about THOSE!

      Do I ever leave short comments??? :)

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    3. YES! TOTALLY! :D

      Is Ellie the girl in the Christmas movie? I've never seen that one.

      GOOD POINT!! How can someone who really loves making movies be content with making such sloppy ones? It doesn't make sense.

      Mwahaha. You would be the one to think of something like that. A serial killer? Really, Kate. What a suspicious mind you have. Haha. ;P

      SO TRUE!! If Ellen had been the heroine things would have been quite different. HA! :D

      "Because he was a man-person! And we wouldn't want any stories about THOSE!" Hahaha. Seriously, Kate. You are TOO funny!! :D Jeff was his name, I think. I always kind of liked him, too. And it annoyed me that he COMPLETELY disappeared without any mention being made of him in the next movie. It's aggravating when stories don't connect properly. :P

      Heehee. That's a very good question. ;)

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    4. I think Ellie is the name of the red-haired one who likes books (wow, such an original character trait!!!)? I forget the name of the movie, but it can't have been any of the Christmas films because I haven't seen any of them.

      Oops, sorry! My penchant for dark and foreboding characters has made its appearance, it would seem. ;)

      Yes!!! Jeff! It was driving me insane that I couldn't remember his name. Most of the guys (Clark being the exception, of course) didn't really bother me??? Willie was kind of cute and Missy's next husband seemed nice... I hated the blacksmith who married Belinda and her first husband was bleh... Anyway. I find that it's mostly the stereotypical heroines who drive me crazy in this series.

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    5. Hmmm...I still can't remember who Ellie is. Even with that HUGE hint about her liking books. Haha. ;P (SUCH an original character trait, yes indeed. ;)) The last film we saw was the first one with Belinda as a blonde. So maybe at that point Ellie hadn't come into the story yet???

      Haha. It has indeed. ;)

      Yes, the stereotypical heroines certainly do have a knack for driving one crazy. Heh. :P I always kind of liked Willie, too. And Jeff. Too bad they had to disappear after the fourth movie.

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    6. I think she is the little girl that Blond-Belinda and Ugly-Blacksmith adopt from the orphanage where all the kids were dying?? She grows up and is red-haired (still) and likes books and meets this guy. He probably dies??? But I haven't watched past the movie where she falls in love with him, so... Still, it's probably a safe bet that he's dead now. ;)

      Oh, I know, right? I almost want to stop being a bookworm because that is such a boring stereotype! (I'm in a play of Beauty and the Beast and I am literally the real-life Belle and it's... troubling.)

      I liked Willie a lot, Jeff not so much. Still, I thought it was unfair that when the characters went their separate ways, THE STORY chose to follow Missy and not Jeff+Collette. (Collette was kind of cute, by the way.)

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    7. Okay, yeah. I was wondering if it might be her, but I wasn't sure if there was time for her to grow up between that and the next movie. I guess there was! Haha. After all, there MUST be a love story, right? And since Belinda's already on her second husband the only alternative is to make her daughter grow up real fast so she can fall in love. Mwahaha. (Oh, yes indeed. He's definitely dead by now. No question. HA!)

      You have a point there. And yes, I think you really must make an effort to dislike books. Anything to crush those stereotypes, right? ;) (Most troubling indeed. You said it.) (Hahaha. You're hilarious!! Like really.)

      Yeah. And the worst of it was Jeff is never even MENTIONED again! It's like he never existed. Which is bad story telling in my book. :P

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    8. Yep, that's her. Ah, but necessity calls for her to grow up and fall in love, so - BAM! She grows up. :)

      I think you're right. I need to endeavour to pick up a truly obscure hobby... otherwise guys will think I'm just pretending to love books to make myself more attractive to them (because apparently loving books is super attractive to men??? No idea why... unless they also like books and this stereotypically is NOT the case...).

      Right? It makes Missy look like such a terrible mother, too! She never even mentions him in passing. I mean, I know he was adopted and a little rebellious and was romantically interested in the bad guy's daughter, but that's no reason to disown him!

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    9. It's amazing what you can do when necessity demands it of you. Heehee. ;P

      So true!! Yes. You'd better start looking for that obscure hobby right away. You don't want to be suspected of having ulterior motives in your love for books. HAHAHA.

      Yeah, anyway. You'd think she would at least make some mention of him! *sigh* I don't get it. I just DON'T get it. *walks away shaking head hopelessly*

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    10. Isn't it, though???

      *scrambles about for a hobby* *settles on... knitting???*

      Agreed. Worst mother ever...

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    11. ;D

      Ha. Good one!! That's definitely a much more obscure hobby for a heroine than reading. I think you've hit on one there. ;) (By the way, do you knit?)

      Very sad...

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    12. I am sorry to say that I do not. :( My cousin tried to teach me but we only had a day or so together... I'm currently learning to crochet, though... Hopefully I will master both eventually! :)

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    13. Don't feel bad! I've been knitting for years, and I still don't know how to do anything really complicated. Crocheting is fun, too. And that's so cool that you're learning how to do that. :)

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  16. I think I may have to see this now, if you would recommend it. :)
    BUT THIS WAS STILL HILARIOUS. I didn't really get the references, but STILL. :D :D :D

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    1. Oh, yes. I would totally recommend it if you're looking for something light and fun to watch. They definitely don't have the best acting or script, and they're rather cheesy, but they can be pretty fun nonetheless.

      Thanks, Rae! :D

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